The Last Episode

I'll never understand why Freaks and Geeks wasn't on TV longer.

I've said it before, if I can ever reach the pinnacle of the emotion Judd Apatow manages to bring to his work, I'll be a happy and contented writer.

The last episode, "Discos and Dragons" is the perfect example of why this show is so great.

People grow up.  They change.  They make choices that define their lives, often without even knowing it.  And kindness, heartache, anger and confusion reside quite frequently together.

I identify with Lindsey, the main character.  She has a somewhat solid family, she gets good grades, and she's smart.  But after her grandma died, she starts acting out, working through her grieving by hanging out with the "wrong" people and often doing things she would never have done before her grandmother's death.  Lindsey is growing up and realizing life isn't all black and white and that the people looked down on are often just as lonely and precious as the ones on top, and people are never who you think they are.

But I really love and strongly identify with James Franco's character, Daniel Desario.  Although our family lives differ greatly, Daniel is...down on himself.  He characterizes himself as stupid (particularly, bad at math), no good, with no future.  Pointless.  But he's often the one who is kind, the quiet listener, the one who wants more out of life than all the rest.

He's lonely, apart, even in the group.  To see where he finally gets accepted as he is brings tears (of happiness) to my eyes.  

And he is smart.  Just not in the school sense.  He's dedicated, with a work ethic.  He wants so badly to be good at something.

As a child I was very angry, quiet and a bit of a con.  I wished I could be in public school so I could get into fights, because that was the only way I knew how to deal with my anger.  I listened to people, and I figured out ways to get what I wanted (I conned several people out of their own toys).  I am a lot like Daniel.  I'm also trying to find out what it is I'm good at (if anything) and if there's any hope of doing something more with my life.

Freaks and Geeks makes me contemplative and nostalgic.  It's the childhood I imagined for myself that I never got (which...might be a good thing).  I miss the 80's.  And I'm really going to miss watching this show.