Juicing: Day 12

Today's juice:

3 carrots
3 stalks celery
1 Honey Crisp apple
1 small bunch grapes

+ some leftover juice from yesterday.

I made a smoothie for myself for dinner:

1/3 c. coconut milk
1 c. strawberries
1/4 c. oats
3 rings of pineapple

For a snack, I popped some corn (in a regular brown paper bag! In the microwave!) and added some mixed nuts. I accidentally melted a few holes in the plastic bag b/c of the hot kernels. Ooops. :/

For lunch, I am allowing myself to eat in the cafeteria, since we got a few free meals from the PineView Apartment office. (It's Thanksgiving meal today) I am still planning on eating healthy - I might eat some meat for protein.

I also joined Sparkpeople.com to track my eating and fitness habits. I've routed my walk to and from work (a little over half a mile, burning 66 calories a day) and the walk to the lake and back ( a little over a mile). There are also fitness programs available, so I'm going to attempt going to the gym one time a week and upping it to 3x by spring.

I am sleeping so much better. It's incredible. And even though my house is driving me crazy (it's halfway clean most of the time), I do have more energy.

Last night's dinner (for me) was scrumptious.

Here's what I did:

sauteed squash & mushrooms (added the chopped pepper/mushroom/onion mix left over from omelettes) in olive oil with a dash of pepper, onion salt, and garlic/herb breadcrumbs.

It was AMAZINGLY delicious. I had a few bites of Stu's porkchops too. (I baked them in the oven with pepper, onion salt & garlic)

We are probably going to stay at 2 juices a day for a while (financial reasons) but if we start exercising regularly we should still lose weight - just more slowly. Which might be better.

I've been having an artistic crisis again (what AM I?? Actress? Dancer? Writer? Artist? Am I good? Can I do that? Do I need further schooling? How can I do it on a daily basis? Am I really one of these? If not, what do I do with my life???) so I've been wondering if I'm just a hobbyist or someone who could do something artistic professionally...sigh. It's not as serious as it was before (I think I'm in a better mental state due to change of dietary habits), but it's still something I think about a lot. No answers, just lots of questions.

It's Morgan's birthday again and while I'm not as sad as I usually am, it's still upsetting to think he'd be 22 this year -- we'd go out to dinner and maybe watch a movie and maybe he'd even live near me.

But then I think about my other brothers and I'm not so sure I'd want crazy hormonal males living near me. All my food would be gone (that was a joke) and I'd have to listen to and watch the mistakes they've made. I don't think I could bear it if Morgan turned out like them. And I secretly think we'd be closer than any of my other siblings.

But if Morgan had lived, we wouldn't have had any other siblings.

It's difficult to deal with that sometimes. I'm grateful for the siblings I have, but I always wonder what it would have been like with the two of us. We were so close when I was little. What would it have been like to have someone so close in age, who (hopefully) understood me more than my parents?

I miss you, little buddy. I can't wait to catch up one day.