No Laughing

I've always hated being laughed at.

I love making people laugh, but when I embarrass myself by dropping something or saying something stupid and people draw attention to it, I feel like I need to run before I fall to pieces.

I have learned to turn the joke on myself a lot of times, so I have gotten better about deflecting the laughter, but last night I had a dream that brought that hateful feeling back.

I was in a crowded room somewhere, (looked like a lodge at night) trying to explain something to the crowd. I counted on my fingers, "four, five, six!" and the whole crowd erupted in laughter at something. I realized they thought I had made a mistake and went on to clarify, but nobody would listen, they were all laughing so hard. I stumbled away and ran into the shadows to hide myself so nobody would see me cry.

I hate that feeling.