Why is Christianity (or what we've made it) so darn complicated?

I'm sitting here at work, pissed.

Because one of my friends, who is 22, hung out with her friend (a guy - who's romantically involved with someone else, I might add) and was told by her older housemate that she was just going to have to make up a rule that "you aren't allowed to be alone with a member of the opposite sex." "Why?" she asked. "Because it makes me uncomfortable...and what will the neighbors think? We have to be good witnesses."

Now...

I see both sides of this issue. I UNDERSTAND that we are to be Christ's witnesses here on earth.

I also understand that Jesus probably had a bad reputation and honestly, I think if people talk it's their problem. As long as God and I work on not sinning, that's good. People are going to talk and you're not going to please everyone.

BUT

My friends' parents, co-worker, and a lot of older people would agree with her housemate. Why? Are we just more immoral than the older generation?

Or

Are we less concerned about appearance and more concerned about the truth?

I'm not dissing older people - I have LOTS of friends who are 50+. I just know they would be HORRIFIED if they knew how much alone time I spent w/ my husband before we were married. For the record, we didn't do anything I regret. We didn't have premarital sex and honestly, it wasn't much of a temptation because I didn't want to spoil our marriage relationship because of a stupid mistake.

It's true - people our age are very stupid. They have pre-marital sex,do drugs and drink irresponsibly and sure, we do a lot of stupid crap we'll regret later.

But I think we are tired of just keeping up appearances. Love us for who we are instead of how we look.

I think that's what's at the bottom of all these jumbled knots in my stomach. It's hard to know what the right thing is to do - my poor friend feels like her parents and the older generation have a lot of authority over her and while she doesn't want to cause conflict, she did hate the way her housemate went about securing her house against males (I say she's just jealous - girls are like that). I mean, seriously, now you have to worry about being with the SAME sex, let alone with the opposite.

On the other hand...I do know some people that have made poor choices - but being yanked away from society with the other sex while growing up...does that really help? Kids need to be taught how to think - how to make tough decisions and deal with the consequences. That's what I want for my children. I want them to know that whatever they do, I love them and that they have to make these decisions for themselves. I just hope they have enough sense to make the right choices.

For me, it's a matter of simple common sense. "Premarital sex hurts your marriage? Really? Oh. I see that played out in older peoples' relationships. I see the practicality of waiting until marriage. Ok." Why do some kids with great parents turn out so bad and why do some kids who have horrible parents turn out ok?

I don't know what the difference is...

But I wish people would be more like Jesus. Mostly I wish I was more like Jesus. Because then I would know what to do in a situation like this.

Sigh.

Here's what I think, after reading this through a few times (sorry for the anger vomit):

I think being a good witness and keeping yourself above reproach is following what Christ said: loving others as much as yourself and loving Him above everything. I think that means we can avoid temptation as much as we want but that we WILL be tempted. No matter how hard we try not to remain in the same room with the opposite sex. I think Jesus probably didn't appear a stellar character. But he WAS. I want to be a testimony of God's grace and goodness - and you know what? I think this situation is like when gentiles and Jews were arguing about circumcision. New believers don't need a whole tome of rules thrown at them - they need to know that Christ loves them and that He is there when you are confused about crap like this.

I'm going to go talk to Him about this.

What does loving your neighbor and God look like when it comes to situations like this?