Solitary

Stu is completely exhausted. An old friend visited this weekend and consequently we were up VERY LATE all weekend. Stu is now sleeping (went to bed at 8:30!) and I am sitting out in the living room, wishing Freecycle would alert me to a free couch or some cool wingback chairs.

Ah, well. All in time.

Lots of thoughts swirling.

First and foremost, I felt really grumpy today. I'm tired too. I don't like dealing with difficult people and there are a choice few that come into the office on a regular basis, and it's tiring to act so nice all the time.

So that's my complaint. I'm also sad I haven't had the chance to walk to work in a few days or spend time outside on the swing.

And I'm really nervous about the wedding this weekend. The music is progressing much better than I thought, but I'm worried about potential drama (there I go, making a mountain out of a molehill) and it's always tiring to be around new people. Plus I have nothing really to wear. So I should fix that.

The house is still messy and although I've done a great job of getting the kitchen clean, that's the most I can manage most nights. The living room is piled with tubs overflowing with clothes and blankets and towels. And the bedroom is covered with stuff.

I guess I feel like we aren't moved in yet, and a state of limbo can only go on for so long. Hopefully Stu can get most of our stuff moved in this weekend and I can unpack next week. Hopefully. But I have a feeling it's not going to happen. (Nothing against Stu - schedules have to be arranged, a vehicle has to be borrowed, and Stu's stomach has to act nice for a few hours) So who knows when we'll actually have my craft table and sewing machine and yarn and Stu's camera equipment and posters and the rest of our stuff?

I do have some things to be thankful for: My library crate is packed with books, I found two Studio Ghibli movies and a Taylor Swift CD in the library which I promptly borrowed, and Stu's mom is helping us out until the end of the month. I also get to spend the weekend with my old roommate, on a road trip, to see one of our other friends get married. So that part will be fun. I'm also glad for friends who sit in my office (you will never know how that makes me feel - quiet friendship means the world to me), my darling husband who appreciates a simple dinner of spaghetti and laughs in his sleep, and Chris Baty for inventing NaNoWriMo, which I am wishing desperately would begin now instead of on the 1st of November!!

So that's part of what's swirling in my brain. I'm also thinking about prayer beads and benches, books of common prayer, the Evening Prayer service (lovely), knitting projects, dollhouses I ache to work on, and a potential writing career, along with the words of Madeleine L'Engle, Laura Ingalls Wilder, and Lloyd Alexander pouring into my head.

Lots to process and no time until tonight to do so.

I wish I was a nicer person.

I'm sad one of our D&D campaigns is ending next week - I love my little character (Ennidh, the Gnome Shaman who has a Panther spirit companion named Sphinx) and I'll be heartbroken saying goodbye (except I SHAN'T because I'll play her in another campaign sometime and probably write a NaNo novel at some point).

Blergh.

Too much thinking. Time for bed.

But I'm going to enjoy the solitude for a few minutes.